My Natural Birth Story – Would I Choose A Birth Center Again?

In this post I am sharing the positive natural birth story of my first baby. I am also sharing whether I would choose to give birth in a birth center again for my next baby. 

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Let's start with the day I went into labor...

My baby’s due date was September 19th and I had a full to-do list everyday leading up to his expected arrival. They day passed with no signs of labor and at my 40 week appointment I was 1.5 cm dilated. The midwife told me that's it's common for first time moms to go 1-2 weeks past their due date and to schedule an ultrasound appointment for the following week just in case. September 20th was the first day in a long time that I had absolutely nothing to do and decided I might as well take advantage of the free time I still had to myself to relax. I spent the day laying in bed watching TV and I remember being SO hungry! No matter how many snacks I ate I could not get full and I ended up falling asleep for a couple of hours. When I woke up I thought "omg I wonder if my body is gearing up to go into labor tonight!"

When Kevin got home from work I asked him to grill the steaks we had in the fridge because like I said, I was starving!! We were on the deck and I felt the tiniest trickle that felt like I peed my pants. I said to Kevin "umm... I think my water might be breaking?!" and I kept leaking little by little for about an hour. At 7:30 I started leaking bigger gushes of fluid and knew my water had official broken. Kevin started going into panic mode making sure we had everything packed up and ready to go. I told him just to relax because it would probably be a while before anything happened and I wanted to shower and curl my hair LOL.

By 9pm contractions had started and they came on fast and furious about 4 minutes apart. I kept saying to Kevin "this just seems so quick!" because we were supposed to head to the birth center once contractions were 4 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute, for an hour. We called the midwife and she said I was probably still in early labor and to check back in between 3-5am. I remember thinking "oh no how long is this going to take because I’m already feeling a lot of pain." We decided we would lay in bed and try to get some sleep before things picked up. I was only able to lay down for about 20-30 minutes when I started feeling a lot of pressure in my back and between my legs and had to stand up. I started thinking "how am I going to do this if I have to stand and walk through all of my contractions?" I decided to get in a warm bath which gave me some relief and I kept telling myself "just make it to 3am."

At 2:30am I couldn’t handle the pain on my own anymore and told Kevin that I thought we really needed to go to the birth center now. We called the midwife back and she said we could meet at the birth center to check my progress but I might have to go back home if I wasn’t in active labor yet. I wondered if I was being dramatic and Kevin asked how bad my pain was on a scale of 10. I remember not wanting to answer because I already thought it was like a 9 or 10 and couldn’t imagine how much worse it could get. 

When we got to the birth center at 3am I was dilated to 5cm and my contractions were 2 minutes apart. The midwife said I should stay and I was so relieved! I hadn’t told Kevin yet but I was prepared to tell him to take me to the hospital if she was going to send us back home. 

The midwife suggested I lay on the bed and try to rest between contractions. I only made it through one contraction and told her I had to stand because the pressure between my legs was so intense. She explained that since my water had broke there was no cushion between the baby’s head and my cervix and that I needed to embrace that feeling because it wasn’t going away. Next we tried sitting on the birth ball in the shower and Kevin sprayed hot water on my back. During contractions I would take the shower head and spray it on my belly while Kevin squeezed my hips to apply counter pressure to my back. I also sat through a few contractions on the toilet with a squatty potty, laid on my side in the bed with the peanut ball between my legs, and rested on my forearms and knees. All of these positions were absolutely killer but they told me I needed to do these to progress myself further and getting in the tub would be my reward. I knew I shouldn't get in the tub too soon because it can slow down the progression, but I knew the water would give me some pain relief. 

 Although I was still extremely uncomfortable I did get a lot of relief from the warm water. I don’t know exactly how long I was in the tub for… this is where time really starts to blur even though there was a huge clock right in front of me. I just remember the hours going by and getting so discouraged that it was taking so long. When the midwife checked me again she could feel the baby's head but I had a cervical lip which meant part of my cervix was swollen, not dilating, and blocking part of the baby's head. 

The nurses and midwife kept telling me I was progressing normally and doing a good job but I just kept thinking “I’m not meant to do this… I know other women can do this but I can’t.” My husband kept telling me how amazing I was doing and I just kept saying “I don’t feel like I am at all." I kind of felt like everyone was lying to me to make me feel better and my reality was that my body was too weak to handle the pain and push my baby out on its own. They kept telling me it would go quicker and easier if I could change my mindset and I know I was being negative but I just seriously thought I was never going to get my baby out. They offered me nitrous oxide and that helped take the edge off and relax my mind but it didn’t really help with the pain at all. I felt like it was making me really tired and a little sick so I told them to take it away. The nurse checked me again and could feel more of the baby’s head so I told her I wanted to start pushing. 

At some point the nurses and midwife suggested that I get out of the tub and try pushing on the bed. They thought I was getting too tired in the water and we needed to try a different position. I was a little disappointed to get out of the tub because I had envisioned a water birth, but I was willing to do anything at this point to get my baby out.

Before I found out I was pregnant and all throughout my pregnancy, I would constantly see the time 11:11. I kept thinking "I wonder if I’m going to deliver my baby at 11:11?!" While I was pushing on the bed I just felt like no matter how hard I pushed he was not going to come out. The midwife looked at the time and said “it’s 11:11 make a wish” and I gave the biggest push. Everyone started cheering and saying that was my best push yet and to keep going! With every contraction I would push 2-4 times. Kevin was holding one leg and a midwife was holding the other. They told me to pull my legs in towards me with every push and send all of my energy down. They would tell me when they could see his head coming out but in between pushes they said I was pulling him back in. I felt the “ring of fire” for maybe 10 minutes or so and my baby was finally born at 11:38am! 

They put him on my chest right away and I immediately burst into tears because I was just so relieved that he was finally here! Everyone was saying how cute he was and talking about how much hair he had. I know I’m biased but he really did look so adorable and sometimes I don’t think babies are very cute when they’re first born lol! He snuggled up to me right away and we did skin to skin until the umbilical cord stopped pulsing and Kevin cut it.

The worst part after delivering the baby and then the placenta is when the nurses have to push on your belly to make sure all of the blood clots come out. I was really nervous about tearing but they said I only had micro abrasions and nothing that required any stitches! Thank you raspberry leaf tea, dates, and ClaraDerm spray! Once they were finished checking us and getting us cleaned up, one of the nurses said to me “it’s always the hardest with your first baby, next time it should be easier and go faster." When she walked out of the door I looked at my husband with tears in my eyes and said “next time I am going to the hospital, I am never doing this again.” I think my husband was a little shocked and maybe disappointed when I said this because to him and the entire birth team it was such a beautiful and amazing birth, but to me it truly felt like torture. Of course the moment my baby was in my arms it was all worth it, but I was a little traumatized by the long and painful labor.

So, would I choose a birth center again for my next baby?

I should probably rephrase the above question to "would I have an unmedicated birth again" because I would 100% have my next baby at the birth center if:

1. I had the option to get the epidural

or 

2. I could guarantee the next time wouldn’t be as painful or take as long

I absolutely loved the care I received from the birth team and the calm environment of the birth suite. It’s hard for me to imagine laying in a hospital bed after my birth center experience where I was able to move around and switch between the bed, shower, and tub without being tied to an IV or any equipment. We stayed at the birth center for 6 hours after I delivered our baby and I was already feeling anxious to get home by that point, so I can’t imagine being stuck in the hospital for 24 hours or longer. The more I think about and process my birth experience, I feel more positive about it day by day. I’ve heard that the female brain forgets about the pain of childbirth in order to continue reproducing, which is crazy but I think it’s true! I already find myself thinking “it wasn’t that bad” when I know that it was!!

The reason I wanted to have an unmedicated birth was to avoid any unnecessary interventions that could potentially lead to complications. I'm so grateful that my baby was born completely safe and healthy and that my recovery was fairly quick and easy. If I decide to have another unmedicated birth with our next baby, I think I really need to work on my mindset and my physical fitness. I wish I wasn't so hard on myself during labor and maybe if I would have had a more positive mindset it wouldn't have felt so long and painful. I also underestimated how much physical endurance labor and delivery requires and I think if I would have been more active throughout my pregnancy maybe I wouldn't have been as exhausted when it came time to push. 

Overall, I'm really happy with my birth experience and even though I was in excruciating pain, I wouldn't change a thing. I know that sounds crazy and in the moment I would have never believed I would say those words. Every second of pain was worth it for my sweet, perfect baby and I couldn't love him more.